Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
