I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
