Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Randomize
