there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
