I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Randomize
