There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
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