The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Ladies don't puke and tell
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize