ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
there was a trapeze. enough said
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
