She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
