is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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