You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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