I heard we made out
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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