If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
