I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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