Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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