something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Randomize
