her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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