they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Randomize
