Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
