Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Is Oprah even human
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Randomize
