Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
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