i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
i used baking grease as lip gloss
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
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