I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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