if i can run in heels then i can drive
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
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