I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
