he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
