Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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