Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
