At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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