What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
