Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
