Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Randomize
