u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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