just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
