My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize
