I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
