I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
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