I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Randomize
