Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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