what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
