$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
