So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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