Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I believe in your delicious
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