Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Randomize
