he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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