Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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