Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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