watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
