its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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