what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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