the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
